Looking in the Mirror: Am I cracked?

What is it with Periurban on YouTube? Here's a guy with a great voice, creative songwriting, and interesting views on -- even a passion for community. His gentle manner and compassionate tone draw you in, and you feel like this guy could be your friend if he wasn't five hours ahead of you on the clock, almost a quarter of a world away. Just when I decide here's a musician I care to keep an eye (or an ear) on, he turns suddenly against the USA, and suddenly, the songs are no longer comfortable to listen to. In fact, they're painful.

Then again, so is looking in a physical mirror. :-)

My patriotism is stung by the sand he's kicked up from the playground, and the child in me wants to come out swinging. How dare he?

Yet the disillusioned, tired citizen in me wants to scream out in the moment, "Yes! Yes! It's cruel what our country is doing in the world!" The part of me that believes the conspiracy theories and doesn't trust the likes of a Washington Politician is pierced to the heart by Peri's words, because I feel trapped. Trapped in a country that has taken down the government of a foreign country under what I believe to be false pretenses, unable to do anything to stop those who would continue to feed our sons and daughters to an enemy that considers their lives to be worth less than that of the family pet.

"It's a democratic country, though -- you can vote! Choose better leaders! Look at the funny Americans in the US that choose such horrible leaders! Hahaha...." Would that my vote were that powerful. I dread the upcoming election. There's a very real possibility that we'll see another Clinton White House, but roles will be reversed. The field of candidates is just that -- a vast field, and the possibilities are many. And is any one of them without corruption? Does any one of them speak for me? How to decide? Choose the Devil you know? The lesser of two evils? I vote so I have the right to complain, and the rest vote to give me something to complain about. Such is the nature of election. I only wish I had a choice of an honest candidate.

Fail to vote and not only do I forfeit my right to complain (In My Humble Opinion). I'd be no longer a part of the solution -- but I'd be part of the apathetic problem. Lumps-on-a-log who don't care, caught up in our own personal lives... Self absorbed.

I'm sorry -- I'm typing while tired again, and I'm having trouble keeping a thought....

The point is: Periurban gets my ire up because the things he says about the US are true -- to an extent. I'm frustrated because I can't make him a liar. When I hear his lyrics, I see myself, part of my country, responsible for the leaders I sent to Washington, responsible for thinking that the war on Iraq could be justified, and I don't care for what I see. Whether we were lied to, or the threat was an honest mistake, we attacked, and now we're losing boys and girls trying to hold it together over there. If we stay, we're evil for continuing the battle, and if we pull out, the power vacuum will be filled with civil war, and we'll be responsible for that. We're left with no out.

And I don't care for being trapped like that. What must it be like to be a soldier facing these feelings each day... My heart cries each time I lower the flag for one of our own killed in action. The flag has seen a lot of half-staff days this year. May it end.

Meanwhile, Periurban, write your songs, but don't think for a minute that every US American is behind this war. Don't think we aren't pained. Indeed, maybe your music will help us feel that pain "enough".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMmixsh9sYQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VpYUhlKO-o
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_P_E91KabMY